Tags

, , , , , ,

Self-worth, what does it mean to you?  I looked it up, to see what the “authorities” had to say about it.  It was as I had thought.  So, again I ask, self-worth, what does it mean to you?  What it means to me is, I no longer feel obligated to do things that do not serve my needs.  As someone who has given, given, given, I had to learn how to say no, and not feel bad about it. What I found was, people don’t mind asking for your time, your energy, your anything, if it’s serving them, but you have to ask yourself, what am I really getting out of this?  Is this going to serve an IMMEDIATE need?  And see, we ALL have immediate needs, and the time has come and gone for doing stuff, just to be doing it.  And trust, that doesn’t mean that I’ll never give of myself again, just means, I’m being more selective, on where I spend my time, energy and services.  Case in point, in the past, I was so focused on doing good deeds, hoping and praying that they would pan out, and one day, I looked up, and I had sunk deeper and deeper into financial need, because I chose to focus on giving, instead of getting, and my time, energy and service, had not been fairly compensated for, yet, I had made a difference in people’s lives.  Which by the way, isn’t hard to do, as it is my passion and my purpose, all intertwined into my destiny.  Learning to value myself, comes at a hard price.  Those who are used to me giving, giving, giving, and once I started declining, declining, declining, could not understand who I had become.  “Who are you to turn me down, I’ve always been able to count on you,” they question me, inside their heads?  I hate to disappoint, but I, myself am in a very disappointing position, as I look up under every rock to try to save myself and those who are supposed to be able to depend on me, and those are my children.  This year, 2015, I will put out into the Universe, I VALUE MYSELF, I VALUE MYSELF, I VALUE MYSELF, and pray that others will one day shout, I VALUE YOU, I VALUE YOU, I VALUE YOU, and show it.  Until next time, LIVE, LOVE, LEARN.

Advertisements